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30 noiembrie 2018

Loneliness

There are nights when
I am feeling like this and there is no reason why
No one to blame
No one to tell
No shoulder to cry on
Life is sometimes loneliness
Despite all the opiates, despite the amphetamins and parties with no purpose
Despite the false grinning I sometimes wear
Yes, there is joy, fulfillment and companionship-
but the loneliness of the soul in its self consciousness is horrible and overpowering
I feel to much. 
Can one feel to much?
Or just feel in the wrong ways?
I feel that I am lonely. And I am lonely in such a horribly way and this feeling runs deep.
And it scares the shit out of me. I can hear the roots of loneliness creeping through me when the world is finally asleep at four o'clock in the morning. But also when I'm surrounded by them awake, at 2PM sharp. 
The most poignant moments of night and life.